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It’s shocking to me how many people have an extremely negative outlook on life, and then have no idea why life isn’t very nice to them in return.

For instance, if you think all women are gold diggers, that’s what you’ll get. I see a tonne of comments online (especially on YouTube and Reddit) from guys complaining, “Women only want your money.” If that’s your outlook, you’re going to confirmation bias and only look for women who confirm your negative outlook, whilst ignoring all the exceptions who don’t want your money. You’ll literally only see gold diggers everywhere you look.

Women do this too. We’ve all met a woman who says, “All men are assholes” or “Men only want one thing.” Again, confirmation bias means she’s going to filter out all the dudes who genuinely want a connection, leaving her with only the guys who just want sex.

She’s creating her own reality.

If you believe people are fundamentally good, and being alive is a wonderful gift – you’ll project that into the world. People who have the same positive life philosophy will naturally be attracted to you and want to hang around you, which will make you even happier, which will attract even more happy people to you. It’s a self-reinforcing cycle.

If you believe women are likeable and nice and will generally bring happiness into your life, then that’s what you’ll end up with – nice girls who bring joy into your life.

The mind is a very powerful filtering tool.